Making Pretty Pictures or Something Else?

What am I doing?  What is it is for me?  It's about 'drawing out' of an unknown mystery.  It is about searching, poking around, making lots of big mistakes and then making a few, little adjustments.  It is about taking a risky adventure and desperately hoping for some good luck.  Yes, it is risky.  But of course, that's the fun of it.  

Making pretty pictures to hang on the wall - that's not it.  Sometimes I do.  I hang up certain pictures because they are like maps.  I use them to figure out where to go and what I want to try next.  

For me, drawing is like panning for gold.  As I wash the material away, there is such a build-up of curiosity and anticipation.  As I draw, I have in mind that the right 'touch' will remove just enough of the paper surface to uncover the drawing beneath.  It is so much like an archaeological dig.  I'm trying to reveal something that is hidden just under the surface.

When something surprising and strangely interesting does emerge out of my explorations, well, that is satisfying as well.  

I know that what I'm doing here has a very personal context.  Sorry about that.  Yet still, I believe my journey is relevant and worth sharing.  After all, we are all trying to figure out our own personal journey.